Many years back I read a newspaper article about Bob Brown, the former leader of the Australian Greens, and him coming to grips with his homosexuality. He had been told to pray about his feelings by his Christian counsellors but to no avail. Eventually a doctor in London where he was studying at the time told him to accept who he was.
Bob’s story is not alone. Many can tell of the torment of feeling different, whether it be with same sex attraction, of feeling like a man trapped in a woman’s body or the other way around, or other dealing with other issues. Many try to deny who they are, fearing rejection and shaming by family, friends and the community at large - and for good reason. It is little wonder that mental health statistics among this community, including suicide rates, are higher than the community average. It is so tragic to hear of anyone taking their life, and it seems even more tragic if the victim is still a child.
As Christians we would like to think they could find safety in the Church but the reality is they don’t. Why? Being told you are an abomination, you will burn in hell forever, you must change your ways and, no doubt, just the feeling of being different keep them away. The Christian community is all too often not a safe place for LGBTI people. One can only wonder what the stigmatisation of this sub-community by the community at large and the Church in particular has on their children.
The community has been judged, shamed, oppressed and outed for centuries. Being LGBTI is not a lifestyle choice. It defies logic that people would choose to be LGBTI knowing all that being found out as such entails.
After centuries of discrimination this community see the enactment of Marriage Equality as going a long way to them as being treated as equals, of being accorded the same dignity most of us take for granted. When they see this move being opposed by many Christians and Churches, what do they see? Love? Or the Churches wanting to continue the inequality and shaming they know only too well? Is there any way they will see in this the professed love of Christians, or Jesus, for them?
I know there are verses in the Bible that talk about homosexuality as a sin, as an abomination. There are some theologians and Bible students who believe these texts do not speak to modern homosexuality and that they are not condemned by Scripture. It is not my intent to discuss those texts. I believe it is important to look at them within the overall context of the Bible, not that it is possible to do full justice to that aim in a short essay.
I am, however, reminded of the story in John 8 of the woman who had been caught in the act of adultery being dragged before Jesus. The penalty, as given in the Law, for such a sin could not have been any clearer. She must be stoned to death. But Jesus, the Lawgiver, took a different approach. 'If any of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her.'
Abraham’s story is recorded for us in Genesis chapters 12-25. Perhaps when we look at his story and understand how God developed a relationship with him we might see how we can better relate to members of the LGBTI community.
Abraham ‘was called God’s friend’ (James 2:23) and ‘father of all who believe …’, both the circumcised and uncircumcised (Romans 4:11.12). So what do we know of this highly honoured man?
- His ancestors, including Nahor, his father, ‘worshiped other gods.’ (Joshua 24:2). Was Abraham raised to do the same? If so, at what time in his life did he stop worshipping these idols? Obviously the writer of Genesis did not think this was important enough to record.
- He was married to his half sister - that’s incest.
- He lied about his relationship with his wife twice, being prepared to let her have sex with other men to save his own skin - hardly the action of an honourable man.
- Genesis 15:6, ‘Abram believed the Lord, and he credited it to him as righteousness’, is well known. But two verses later in response to God’s promise to give him the land he questions “Sovereign Lord, how can I know that I will gain possession of it?” Is this the response of strong faith?
- Many years later God tells Abraham his wife Sarah will bear him a son. In response he ‘fell facedown; he laughed and said to himself, “Will a son be born to a man a hundred years old? Will Sarah bear a child at the age of ninety?” And Abraham said to God, “If only Ishmael might live under your blessing!”’ (Gen. 17,18)
- He fathered a child with his wife’s servant. We would call that adultery. He also had children to his concubines - we are not told how many children or concubines (Gen. 25:6).
- Then there is the story of his willingness to offer his son as a sacrifice. This was a common cultural practice. Abraham seems to have immediately set out to comply with the command. Was his knowledge of God such that he believed this was consistent with His character? Was he aware of God’s covenant with Noah and all his descendants, especially the provision dealing with the shedding of human blood?
And for your lifeblood I shall surely demand an accounting. I will demand an accounting from every animal. And from each man, too, I will demand an accounting for the blood of his fellow man.
Whoever sheds the blood of man, by man shall his blood be shed; for in the image of God has God made man. (Gen. 9:5,6)
So that’s Abraham, the first person in the Bible to be called a prophet (Gen. 20:7). I know I have focused on the negatives but I have a reason for that. He doubted God, lied, fathered children to women other than his wife with whom he shared an incestuous relationship. He did not question the command to sacrifice his son, and he may have worshipped idols, at least for some of his life. Can you imagine any Church today welcoming Abraham into fellowship, let alone giving him a position of leadership? I can’t.
Love is not something God does. It is what He is. And He looks to those who profess His name to share that love with a hurting world. His love does not exclude anyone, for all have the invitation to accept His embrace. 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 is a great descriptor of what that love is:
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
We see this love worked out in God’s relationship with Abraham. Despite Abraham’s many failures God maintains the friendship. There are no words of condemnation, no dishonouring of His friend. When Abraham fails God maintains the conversation, the relationship, working with him and bringing him back to the next test. This is a friendship that ‘always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres’.
Is this a model we can use to build friendships with others, and within the context of this essay the LGBTI community in particular?
We know that God calls homosexuality a detestable thing (Leviticus 18:22). But if we read that verse in context it is only one of different things also seen as detestable, including having sex with one’s sister (as did Abraham) and sacrificing children to Molech. It is also worth noting that ‘a lying tongue’ is also called ‘detestable’ (Proverbs 6:16,17). We can therefore only conclude that if gays are detestable in God’s eyes then they must be seen as standing side by side with God’s friend Abraham. So can we as Christians stand beside them and others in the LGBTI community as their friends also?
We need to live out the same principles we see in 1 Cor 13:4-7 as we walk with our LGBTI family members, friends and neighbours. God gave Abraham time to grow, not to any preconceived standard we may have set, but as God led. Just as God protected Abraham so we must protect others from the barbs, condemnation and shaming of the world - and others in the Christian community. At no time did God set out to dishonour, or shame, His friend. Rather, He honoured him as the first named prophet in the Bible, and as the Father of the Faithful, the Friend of God. Surely there can be no higher honour granted any human being than this.
If Abraham was given such high honour why should be stand in the way of members of the LGBTI being treated as equals in the community of God,being loved, supported and allowed to grow in grace along with the rest of us?
Quotes from the New International Version